


Feeling Alive

by Hillyloveswriting



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Gore, Humor, Love, M/M, Murder, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Possessive Dean, Serial Killer!Dean, Smut, Teasing, lots of flirting, lots of pie
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-12
Updated: 2015-10-12
Packaged: 2018-03-07 06:04:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3164054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hillyloveswriting/pseuds/Hillyloveswriting
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel Novak is bored and gifted. He can heal people and himself despite that fact, his life is boring. No adventures or quests to go on. That all changes when a certain green-eyed serial killer walks in his workplace. </p><p>Dean Winchester is serial killer who has lived many lifetimes and is perfect in what he does the problem was, he's lonely. Although all that changes when he walks in a certain gas station and meets a blue-eyed beauty.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Bored.

That’s what Castiel Novak is, **bored**. He is bored and apparently crazy since no sane man refers to himself in third person. I was irked, as I made it clear; I thought that by this point in my life I would’ve been in an awesome relationship and have an awesome job, but instead look at me! I’m a freaking cashier at Gas-N-Sip and the day has never been slower.

How did I get here? How did I get from a rich family to working at a foulness gas station wearing tacky blue vests? Oh yeah my family are a bunch of homophobic dicks with the exception of my older brother Gabriel. He’s the brother any gay younger brother can ask for. If he were to come in right now and saw me leaning against the counter twiddling my thumbs he wouldn’t care, not one bit.  He’d just buy candy, give me a hug and be on his way.

There’s a reason why my life isn't complete shit and it’s due to my ability. I’m not a mutant or anything but I was born with an ability. It’s not rare to have an ability but it’s not common either. I have the ability of healing; I can heal myself and others even to the point of death, impressive right? Well my parents thought so too. They believe it was a gift from god himself, that I should be using it to heal people like an angel…..like a **doctor**. They created high expectations for me not caring if it was something I wanted to do with my life. It’s not that I don’t want to heal people it’s just I know I’m meant for something more even if it sounds cheesy as hell.

My family is what you except out of any religious family; strict, no fun and most of all homophobic. Ever since I came out they have been extremely passive-aggressive more aggressive then passive toward me. They said the stereotypical insults saying I would go _hell_ if I were ever to lay with another man, that I’m sick and I need help, that since god gave me such an amazing gift the devil felt the need to tempt me **_blah blah blah_**. The worst though was my mother, she would be crying hysterically and would start hitting herself on the head murmuring how she failed me, that she could’ve prevented this if she were a better mother, it was awful. I’ve never been close to anyone in my family, with the exception of Gabriel, but seeing my mother cry made my heart clench painfully. Back then I would’ve done to gain my mother’s approval so I did what any other kiss ass would do, I lied. I told her I was lying and was testing my parent’s faith and I would be the doctor she would want me to be and all that type of bullshit. The result was immediate she quickly cleaned herself up, laughed it off then hugged me saying that she was proud of me and that I would the best doctor/healer the world has ever seen _ohhh ahhh_. I think she even said something along the lines of ‘ _bringing honor to the family’._ I didn’t even think she knew the movie Mulan!

Suddenly I was startled out of my thoughts when I heard a loud thump outside. I stood up and looked out to see today’s newspapers stacked in front of the store. I left the counter and headed outside to retrieve the papers. As I brought them in and placed them on stand where they belong, I grabbed one for myself and along the way a cup of coffee too. Only the lord knows that if I’m gonna be working all day I might as well be awake for a portion it, even if the coffee is crappy. I lifted my feet up and placed them on the counter, and leaned back on my chair.

The paper said there’s a serial killer on the loose, said that his kills were ruthless and merciless. Said serial killer's name is Dean Winchester and in the front of the page there’s a really badly drawn sketch of him. I haven't seen the man's face in real life or anything but there's no way someone has a nose that hooked and upturned. I sighed and threw the paper face up on the counter while leaning back and finishing my coffee. Soon I got consumed by my thoughts, I mean I’m not sure why but I’m wasn’t really concerned about the serial killer, weird right? I’m wasn't scared like I’m was supposed to be, it’s probably because of that inner thrill I get knowing that danger is out there. Honestly it’s wasn't only today I’ve been bored, I’ve actually been bored my entire life and was heading towards more boredom if I didn’t drop out of Doctor College. Thank god I did.

My life consisted of business meetings, formal gatherings and fixed up dates with rich prudish assholes. Yeah I’m from _that_ type of family, boring! All of my life I’ve been searching for an adventure, something to get the blood pumping in my veins and feel the adrenaline coursing though my body. I thought I found that in high school by dating the school’s bad boy but all I got from him was a lousy sex, but I mean terrible. I looked back at the paper and started thinking about the serial killer, Dean Winchester, roaming these parts of Illinois on the run and FBI’s most wanted. God the adventures he must go on a daily basis I mean yeah he’s a killer and whatnot but he must have his reason for killing. Wait- _why am I defending a serial killer I have never met?_ Ah perks of being an empath.

Back on track, the rush he must get from being chased from the police, the successful murders done one after the other and getting away with all of it. Hey this didn’t mean I was gonna become a serial killer myself, I don’t have the skills or techniques to become one and hey isn’t that a messed up thought. I chuckled to myself, I can’t be a killer not because it’s wrong to kill but because I don’t have the **_skills and techniques_**. To be honest I think some killings are justified, some people just plainly deserve it, all the bad guys, rapists and perverts deserve it. Then there are the people who don’t, children being a prime example. I see the world as white and black, good and bad, killers and victims.

Growing up with the family I had has made me cold-hearted and realistic to these truths. I don’t like to think that everyone has good in them like Clark Kent in fact the exact opposite I like to think that everyone has evil in them. That everyone has that appalling, depravity, grotesque side to them. That side they don’t show to others in aversion of being viewed as a monstrosity. Only a few group of people display that side and those people are our dear murderers, rapists, sadists and psychopaths. There are people who actually try their best to overcome their worst, to overcome the feral imperfection that is humanity. That 1% who try to do good, they get therapy and work out their issues but sadly it would all have been for nothing, why? Because the 99% will always win, corrupt and defile.

Woah no wonder I’m single. I chuckled to myself and started to shake off these formidable thoughts currently brewing in my brain. This is why I shouldn’t be left alone for large quantities of time, I get terrifyingly morbid. Just as I was about to sink back in my black hole of despair the bell rings, signaling that someone just entered the store.

 

It was a man in a brown leather jacket and judging by where I’m standing about 6’1 feet tall with short brown almost blondish hair and this is all I gathered from looking at his back.

 I looked away there’s no reason be to over analyzing the only man who has come to the store today. I stood up turning my back to counter and began stretching my stiff muscles, leaning on the counter all day will do that to you. When I started stretching my arms I felt my dress shirt ride up a bit, exposing my toned stomach and back. Just as I was about to bend down and stretch my legs I see someone at the counter. It’s the man, I mean who else really, and he had a devilish smirk on his face his eyes traveling all over my body.

“Well don’t let me stop you. Please continue I was admiring the view.” As I started making my way over to the counter I could feel the beginning of a blush etch onto my face. I smiled to myself and looked at the man and hey go figure the man is fucking gorgeous, although he strikes some sort of familiarity. He had bright green eyes like those of an emerald, a fine chiseled jaw that looks like it can cut stone, bright pink lips as if he bites them all day not to mention the cute freckles decorating his face like constellations. If I’d stared long enough I would’ve started counting them or mapping them, speaking of staring it seems that I’ve been starting at his face for a little to long. Ducking my head I began checking out his items I would've done it more efficiently but the thing was I could feel him watching my every move, his eyes kindling a fire on my skin. The longer he looked the redder I felt my face become flustered beyond belief. When I finished bagging his items I shyly looked back up at the man and was surprised to find a hungry gaze embellished on his face.

“T-that’ll be $19.98.” I stuttered out, face burning red.

Suddenly he starts to lean over his face getting progressively closer to mine and I let him and don't move away, which is a bit weird since I have only known this Adonis for about half a minute. Just as he was about to say something the screeching of cars outside made him halt. The man moving away I was able to breathe properly again but curiosity overwhelmed me and I looked outside. Astonishingly the store’s gas station lot was full of police cars and policemen and seemed to be enveloping us in the building.

Tilting my head I was dumbfounded, what the hell was going on? The stranger seeing the confusion on my face turned towards me again and spoke “It looks like they found me.”

Ignoring the flicker of heat my body blossomed, at the roughness yet soothing sound of his voice, I focused on the ease he seem to speak with that I couldn’t help and tilt my head more in confusion. “W-what do you mean ‘they found you’?” I stuttered out again, an uneasy feeling filling my chest.

Staring at his face suddenly, it hit me. I looked down at the newspaper, the stranger following my gaze, and raised my eyebrows in realization. I looked back up again and found the man to be smiling, happy at being recognized.

“You’re a smart one aren’t you? Bewitching and smart. I fucking like it.” He spoke with a purr in his voice. I gulped. He then stood up straight, green eyes never leaving my blue ones, and spoke “I guess I should introduce myself?” he held out his hand “Hi I’m Dean Winchester and those guys out there are here for me. I'm also willing to bet that you know the reason why.” He finished with a wink.

I guess this day isn’t going to be as boring as I thought.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there! It's me! Here's a new chapter! Hope you enjoy it!

Chapter 2

“Dean Winchester we have the place surrounded! Come out with your hands in the air!” A policeman bellowed outside.

There were at least more than twenty cars outside, each car with three or four cops surrounding it. I honestly didn’t know how to feel at the moment. I was currently inside my workplace with a well-known serial killer and we were surrounded by more then eighty cops outside. I can say with no hesitation that days like these don’t come by too often. Many emotions were brewing in me the top ones being surprised, shocked, confused and I’m not ashamed to admit but I was also feeling a tinge of excitement as well. I was surprised for two reasons; one, I'm standing less than a foot away from America's most wanted serial killer and two; I’m not expressing the slightest amount of fear. Which considering the circumstances I should’ve needed a dash of terror, a spoonful of worry and a few gallons of fear. _No scratch that_ , more then a few gallons more like a few tons!

Any other normal person would have followed this recipe to perfection but apparently I’m not any other normal person, _hoorah_. With so many emotions and a little bit of sanity I decided to deal with confusion, the rest will soon come later. I don’t know what compelled me to ask the next question but I did it anyways.

“How did they find you?”

Dean's smirk quickly got replaced with confusion, furrowing his eyebrows, at the question he’s probably not used to dealing situations like these, where his hostage is asking strange questions not begging for his life. The question although was completely valid and perfectly reasonable. Judging by the number of times Dean Winchester has been caught, which is zero to none, he can disappear of the face of the earth if he wants to. So how did the police find him in a deserted gas station out in the middle of nowhere?

Dean then smiles at me and looks at me with a outlandish glint in his eyes. He then goes through his bags and pulls out a container full of pie. He opens it and looks at me gesturing for a fork. I sighed and opened the drawer near me, pulled out a fork and handed it over to Dean. Dean reach over for the fork but in doing so he gently caressed my hand, his fingers tracing every noticeable vein on my hand, the whole time maintaining eye contact.

He plucked out the fork out of my grasp and began eating his pie; at that moment I figured out that Dean is a tease in every action he does. The way he was eating his pie was in every way…. ** _scandalous_**. The way he pouted his lips when he was taking the bite out of the fork and the way he licked the fork and his lips afterwards, ugh. To say the least, it was arousing and lascivious, which was completely inappropriate considering the circumstances.

I was so distracted with my inner ramblings that I almost didn’t hear him speak.

“Because I wanted them to.” I was baffled, wanted them to what?

“Pardon?” I asked.

He puts his fork down and leans against the counter with crossed arms, he looks at me and smirks “They found me so easily because I wanted them to.”

He looked so relieved as if he just told someone a terrible secret. Once again I was baffled by the serial killer, does he want to get caught? He sighs loudly; sounding physically and emotionally tired, and begins to elaborate with a lazy smile on his face.

“The cops have always been a thorn on my side; they are always making me run, ruining my perfect kills, drawing _terrible_ pictures of me.” He looks down at the newspaper and I followed his gaze, nodding my head in agreement. It really was a bad picture. Looking up I saw Dean looking pleased that I had agreed with him on that fact.

He continues, “Sure sometimes I love the feeling of getting chased and knowing for a fact they’ll never catch me is such a rush but sometimes even a killer like me needs a break!”

He shakes his head in annoyance and looks outside once more, I look out as well. All the police officers have their guns positioned at Dean, following his every move. There are some officers looking at me too, their faces clouded either in worry or burning suspicion. The latter is most likely because well **I am** maintaining a normal conversation with a _fucking serial killer_.

Dean lifts up an arm and places it on my shoulder, I blush at the heat radiating from his hand, as if testing out a theory. The reaction outside is immediate and all the cops look ready to blast his hand off my shoulder. Dean removes his hand and sighs exasperatedly, clearly annoyed at the cops reaction. He looks at me with an incredulous look on his face, as if the cops called him a dirty name.

“See?! Annoying! I can’t go out to buy some pie without them following my every move. Talk about aggravating!”

I look at Dean weirdly, “Dean maybe they’re being ‘aggravating’ because well I don't know you it's not like you are a serial killer who happens to be number _one_ on the FBI’s priority list?” I speak to him pointedly. I couldn’t help the sass, it’s just who I am.

Dean smiles and leans closer to me and whispers in my ear with a purr, “I like a man like that”.

Attitude gone, I shudder slightly and ask breathlessly, “Like what?”

“A man with sass and who doesn’t take shit from anyone.” He answers with a wolfish smile.

“How do you know I don’t take shit from anyone?” I asked curiously.

He has a glint in his eye when he answers, “Well for one in all the time I’ve been here with you, never once have you shown any sign of fear in those exquisite blue eyes of yours.”

Blushing at the compliment, I tilt my head in curiosity, “Why should there be fear in my eyes Dean?”

Dean looked elated at me using his name. Strange, what was he expecting? He moved away from me and I admit I'll miss the warmth his body provided.

“Castiel right?” I look at my name tag and nod “Well Cas, you are trapped in a gas station with a very well-known serial killer, are currently surrounded by cops, and well call me crazy but other people would’ve started crying or something, maybe begging for their lives.” He had a good point I was way to calm to be considered normal but I don’t know there’s just something about being within Dean’s atmosphere that wasn’t alarming. It was comfortable, which ironically enough shouldn’t be the case.

I don’t know where the urge to tease Dean came from, it seemed I’m doing things that I wouldn’t normally do under normal circumstances but I couldn’t withheld the next statement in even if I tried. “Well I don’t know Dean do you want me to beg?” And there’s that lustful gaze again.

“Oh you’ll beg alright but not for your life.” There was a promise in Dean’s words and he didn’t seem like the man who would break his promises. I couldn’t help but laugh in disbelief.

“Why are you laughing?” asked Dean grumpily, he looked as if I’ve spit in his coffee.

I smiled and leaned closer to Dean this time, “Dean we are surrounded by more than a dozen cops and all you seem to doing about that fact is complaining how needy they are or flirting with me. You also pay more attention to how unfazed I am about this situation, which in some way makes me a hypocrite, than worrying on how you’re leaving here without cuffs on your hands.

Dean smiles and looks outside, the cops still in position, and looks back at me, “Speaking of the cops, it seems like they are doing some research on you. They by now must be thinking you're some sort of friend of mine.”

I looked outside while he looked backed at me and saw what Dean was saying was true. The policemen have seemed to made themselves comfortable and have assembled a table with three expensive looking laptops a women in front of them, typing very quickly while some men surrounded her and kept looking up at me as if listing off details of me. The women then stopped and looked as if she had found something, she showed it to the man standing next to her and he looked up at me. He then proceeded to grab the megaphone from the previous cop that spoke before and walked in front of the group, I nudged Dean in the arm and making him look back outside.

“Dean Winchester,” I saw Dean narrow his eyes at the man it seemed that Dean knew the cop speaking, “Please release Mr. Novak into our custody.” He then turned to look at me, “ _Casteel_ please know that you’re currently talking to a murderer, an emotionless being who has no interest in you but in killing you!” I’m not sure why but I felt offended by the officer’s words. Was he implying Dean wouldn’t like me in any other way that didn't result in Dean killing me? He also mispronounced my name, which come on is not _that_ hard to say, Dean got it in the first try.

I looked at Dean but I wasn’t expecting the look on his face, he looked enraged. It probably had to do with the fact that the officer called ‘emotionless’. I wouldn’t and couldn't let myself hope that the anger he was emitting was regarding me because of what the cop said.

Although it seemed that Dean liked having the last word and turned to me, his face softening, “Does your store have any sort of microphone or speaker so I can communicate with the idiots outside without having to leave here?” Despite Dean speaking to me nicely, there was that withheld anger in his eyes.

I spoke cautiously, “Well the store does have speaker system that plays awkward elevator music outside,” I chuckle at my sad attempt of joking, “but if you want to I can connect the microphone I use to notify the customers of closing time.”

He looks at me sweetly, “If that wouldn’t be a problem Cas.”

I smile, “Of course not Dean but you’re going to have to come in here to speak in it.”

I then opened the little door connected to the counter and gestured for Dean to come in. Dean looks outside and smirks at the cops he then proceeds to walk in touching me more then necessary, not that I was complaining, and stood closer to me.

The cops on the other hand did not like Dean’s little stunt of moving closer to me, “Dean Winchester get away from Mr. Novak!” Dean only proceeded in flipping them off.

Dean turned to me and smirked, he seemed happier to be closer to me. I had to ignore Dean for a second while I started to set up the microphone, so I backed away and got to it. The problem was that I had to bend down in order to do so and when I did I could feel Dean’s eyes burning onto my ass. That man had no sense of boundaries and that’s comes from a guy who has heard the words ‘personal space’ directed at him more then once in his lifetime.

“Hey Cas?” Dean spoke.

I looked back, turning my head, “Yes Dean?”

He smiled cheekily, “You’ve got a great ass.”

I blushed hard and nearly fell on my ass due to his words. I looked back forward and tried to ignore the increasing heat growing in my belly. I finished connecting the right cables and stood back up. I turned to Dean gestured for him to come over; he had apparently moved back a bit to get a better view of my ass.

It was only polite to thank Dean for his…comment, “Thank you Dean. I don’t usually get many compliments and even though considering the circumstances which deem this inappropriate, it’s nice to be complimented.” I finished with a small smile. Dean however looked flabbergasted.

“WHAT?! What do you mean you don’t get compliments?”

I laughed, “Exactly what the words mean Dean. In the community I grew up in people weren’t exactly begging to get into bed with me.”

Dean gasped loudly and exaggeratedly, he began pacing back and forth with a hand on his mouth he looked disturbed.

I spoke again with a genuine smile and amusement clouding my face, “It’s not really that big of a deal Dean.”

He looked at me shocked and walked towards me and grabbed me by the shoulders gently and spoke, “Not a big deal?! Not a big deal Cas?!” I looked around with wide eyes, amusement decorating my face and nodded. “Cas you are gorgeous!” I blushed furiously, “Knowing that not many people haven’t begged to be with you is outrageous and borderline crazy! It's a travesty!”

I smile widely and step out of Dean’s warm hands and push him towards the microphone, I lean towards him a little bit and whisper in his ear, “You really know how to flatter a man, don’t you Winchester?” I felt him shiver, “Don’t you have some cops to talk to?” When I pulled away I swear I could hear growl a little, but got back on task on hand and looked forward. “Just press the red button when you want to speak.” I informed him. He nodded and I went to sit on the counter and grabbed the pie he was previously eating and started eating it myself.

He pressed the red button and spoke, “Hello? Hello can you hear me?” The cops got startled and started looking around and then towards the store. Dean smiled, “Oh! I’ll take that as a yes.” Dean's enraged expression then came back, “I just wanted to clarify that **_Castiel_** doesn’t have to be a victim of mine to get my interest.” He spoke harshly.

I on the other hand stilled, I was surprised so he wasn’t angry because of what the rude cop said but what he said regarding me. I couldn’t and wouldn’t stop the heat in my belly even if I wanted to.

Dean continued, “I mean look at him! HE’S HOT!” Oh blushing face you’re back! “Ever since I came into the store he has treated me with nothing but kindness.” Outside a cop leaned over to whisper to the cop next to him the other one nodding along. I wasn’t the only one who saw the small interaction. Dean narrowed his eyes and spoke, “Got something to sure with the rest of the class buddy?”

The cop looked red-handed but then turned smug. He took the megaphone from rude cop and spoke, “Kindness Winchester? The boy is probably frightened out of his mind. Why would he treat you, a serial killer, with kindness?”

Dean looked confused and turned to look at me asking me a silent question. I just shrugged my shoulders in confusion. Dean then laughed, but there was something off with his laugh, “Does he look like he’s about to piss himself?!” All the cops suddenly turn all of their attention towards me and I cower at the attention but wave to them unsurely. The cops looked baffled by now.

Dean looked pleased by the looks on their faces and he spoke once more but, this time his voice outlining a threat, “Look I’m tired and I want to leave and if you don’t clear out in the next five minutes…” Dean then took out a gun from the back of his pants, cocked it, and aimed it at me, “I will shoot out Mr. Novak’s brains out.”

I should've be scared; should've have finally showed any sign of fear but I didn’t. I wasn’t afraid. There’s a gun aimed at me and I wasn’t afraid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OOOH. Stay tuned!
> 
> Leave comments and kudos regarding the story. Ask me any questions and I'll be sure to answer them.  
> Comments= Destiel rainbows and a happy author :D


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I suck ass for not updating sooner. Yeah it's been a hard year for year dealing with my disarray of disorders but today i had a seemingly calm day and decided to finally update so here it is. Don't worry about the next update because chapter 4 is already in the works!

Chapter 3

There are approximate 2,625 serial killers in the US each with different kills and different signatures. There are psychopaths and sociopaths while some are disillusioned or have a certain mental illness. Some kill for fun or revenge, others kill because of a childhood trauma or simply a way to release anger. A serial killer by definition is a person who has murdered three or more people. I have no doubt that people who have been held at gunpoint didn’t get to live the following day but my situation was different or at least I hoped it was.  

Honestly I couldn’t see Dean shooting me, something in my gut told me he wouldn’t. I could be wrong and by the end of the day pieces of my brain are going to be scattered around the room, not that it would kill me, hello healer here. Either way, after today, my life will never be the same again.

The cops by now look alarmed and were talking rapidly amongst each other, probably discussing their next move. Dean turned off the microphone and looked my way, worry etched in his eyes. I ignored it and went back to eating Dean’s pie in a placid mood. I then held out a piece of pie on my fork towards Dean, edging him towards to eat it. Dean, slowly, walked towards the fork, while putting his gun back behind his pants, and wrapped his lips around it and slowly took the piece of pie and began eating it. The whole action itself screamed out intimate, the way I was feeding Dean as if he was my loved one, and judging by the wistful look on Dean’s face he seemed to realize it too.

Dean backed away and coughed, breaking our stupor and placing his hands in his coat pockets “Cas I have a question.” I nodded urging him on “Why aren’t you afraid of me? And I’m honestly curious. I want to know how this whole ordeal is going by and your eyes haven’t still haven’t shown a single glimpse of fear.”

Why does he keep referring to my eyes?

“I’ve told you why Dea-”.

He cuts me off before I could finish.

“No you haven’t Cas. You only deflected my question by asking another question yourself, being the tease you are.” He goes to lean on the counter, his arms holding him up, all the while maintaining eye contact. “Seriously though, in all my time being serial killer I have never met someone who wasn’t afraid of me, afraid for their life, afraid of what I could possibly do to them. So what’s up Cas? Why are you so different?” He stares at me with inquisitive eyes.

Out of that whole statement, the only thing I couldn’t help but pick up on was on how lonesome it sounded. When was the last time Dean actually interacted with someone that wasn’t apprehensive to talk to him? I could relate to him though, on how being lonely can suck ass, working in a deserted Gas-N-Sip doesn’t really do wonders on one’s social or dating life.

I clear my throat, putting the pie down on the counter and focus all my attention to Dean. “I’ll be honest with you Dean. I’m not really sure myself.” Dean looked as if he was about to interrupt again so I held my hand up, silencing him. “Dean this whole situation is perplexing,” I walk towards the window and look at the cops. “Earlier today I was reading about you in the newspaper and was in a really morbid place about humanity and then all of a sudden you come in all smiles and flirty remarks, only for me to find out that the exact serial killer I was reading about earlier is standing right in front of me.”

I go to stand next to him and gaze at him directly in the eyes.

“Dean, I don’t live an exciting life so to have a well-know serial killer walk in my place of employment is something improbable. So to finish up nicely, I am kind a fascinated with you,” I put my left hand on top of his right, his eyes widening slightly. “I wanna know you, despite your social status, something about you is captivating. Plus I kind of envy the action and excitement you must get on a daily basis, the way you get away with your kills and play with the authorities. In some sort of twisted way….I admire you.”

By the time I finished Dean looked shocked, perturbed, vexed and even a little bit doubtful. He suddenly looked angry, turns around, and pushes me against the counter **hard** , the edge of it digging into my hips, his hands gripping my wrists between our chests. Dean’s whole body language screamed dangerous but his eyes spoke something different, he looked lost, which is a good enough of a reason as not to get aroused and revel in Dean being rough.

Heart pounding, not out of fear, I gathered all of my courage and stared back at him with the same amount of intensity he was giving me, there was practically diminutive space between our faces. I could feel his breath on my lips and it would only take moving a small fraction for our lips to meet in a heated kiss. I blushed at the thought. From this distance I could also caught a hold of his scent and he smelled absolutely alluring, the scent of his leather jacket, the smell of motor oil insinuating that he owned a car of sorts, the pleasant smell of raw cinnamon and something that be purely described as _Dean_. I bit my lip to keep in the small whimper threatening to emerge. Unbeknownst to me, Dean was barely holding back his own self-control.

With a primal growl Dean spoke in a low voice “You admire me Cas? Admire me?! How can you say that? I’m a monster Cas! I’ve done things to other humans that you would not believe, appalling barbaric things! That wasn’t the response I expected to receive from you!”

Dean spoke in such a repugnant tone but I understood now.

“What did you expect Dean?” I cut in softly, still looking at him.

With a harsh sigh Dean answers quietly “What any other sane person would say Cas.” It wasn’t a question but a statement.

Breathily I ask “And what would any other sane person say Dean?” I move slightly so that the tips of our noses were touching, my eyes unintentionally closing, “Do you want me to scream? Do you want me to hit you and make a run for my life? Do you want me to beg?” He sucks in a breath “Beg for my life? Do you want me to ask ‘why me’? What did I ever do to deserve this fate? Do you want me to call you a monster?”

“Stop-” Dean starts but I don’t let him.

“Stop what Dean? You wanted this didn’t you? You want me to call you the worst of names. You wanted me to hate you from the start. Why? I’ve only known you for a short amount of time but,” opening my eyes, “I can read you so clearly.”

I tilt my head, “You seem to have this self-loathing about yourself. You **despise** yourself; you look at a mirror and hate what you see.” Dean’s grip on my wrists seemed to have loosened and so I took the opportunity to raise a hand and gently touch his cheek, cupping his jaw, he flinched on contact but stayed nonetheless.

“I am fascinated with you. Don’t make me hate you because I won’t.”

Dean looked exposed and overwhelmed; wanting to finish this conversation he nodded and backed away from me. He ran his hands through his hair and cleared his throat.

“I don’t want you to hate me Cas. In fact I want the opposite,” He whispered the latter so softly that I almost didn’t hear him. “I just don’t like this admiration that’s coming from you, I feel like a zoo animal. Like an animal in display.”

Clenching his jaw he continues, staring at me unrelenting, voice hard again, “In fact how do I know I’m not just some sick perverse fantasy from you? How do I know you’re not like the saint you appear to be? Huh?! Answer me that _Castiel_.”

Dean spoke my name in a demeaning manner as if questioning if that really is my name. It’s funny how the serial killer is suspicious of his ‘hostage’. I know what Dean’s trying to do; I do it all the time. He’s trying to hurt me or push my buttons simply to distance himself from me and vise versa. He’s hoping to hurt me in some way that in return I start hating him and possibly lash out in fear. It’s understandable, someone you just met already has you figured you out and is broadcasting out your inner fears and insecurities, he’s a rabid animal trapped against a corner.

I have been told before that I can be a bit intense and a little too perceptive and more often than not I make people very uncomfortable. My intensity making others believe that I’m wrong in the head, and maybe I am. There’s no clear way to describe me some refer to me as kind, charming and good-willed while others refer to me as wrong, apathetic and weird. Maybe that’s why Dean’s feeling hostile towards me within the first 20 minutes of meeting me he probably changed impressions of me. No matter what he or others think of me I have a lot of sides to me and I don’t really give a shit of what they think, it’s as simple as that. I haven’t spent most of my life building up walls and strengthening my resolve for nothing.

However the ‘saint’ line did hit a nerve but I’m not letting that show to Dean. I’m usually so composed but Dean is affecting in ways I can’t comprehend. It seems he’s not the only rabid animal in here. A little irked and competitive I decided I’m not going to submit so easily.

Crossing my arms and chuckling harshly, I stare at Dean amusingly, “You are an enigma Dean Winchester. You rather make hurtful accusations rather than accept the fact that you are appealing to me. So what if my interests are a bit unusual or weird? I don’t exactly come from an accepting background so this hostility is not new to me. This is strange for me too, I mean,” I raise my arms gesturing at Dean; “you’re a serial killer! I don’t understand why I feel so at ease with you!

Lowering my arms and I go to sit on the counter once more and stare out the window, looking at the flashing lights, voice soft again I sigh, “Maybe you’re right. Maybe it does make me a freak for having an interest in you. So what are you going to do now Dean? The police’s five minutes are up I’m sort a excepting to get shot by now seeing how you already expressed your feelings towards me.”

Maybe I’m being petty but understand this; I’ve lived a hard and judgmental life and then I meet this attractive charming guy only to find out he’s the country’s number one serial killer and then to find out that certain aspect of him doesn’t bother me. Then said charming serial killer goes ahead making me feeling like a freak for expressing my interest towards him, you think that boosts his ego or something.

I turn at the sound of Dean sighing heavily, “God damn Cas you really know how to make a guy feel like crap and that’s coming from a guy who kills for a living.”

Smiling softly Dean approaches me and puts his hands on each side of my legs effectively trapping me between him and the counter. He stares at my face and then turns to look outside and then back at me. Putting a few fingers under my chin, still smiling softly, his eyes create a menacing glint and reaches behind his pants again to pull out his gun. Lowering his fingers and placing them back beside me, he replaces his fingers with his gun, the cool metal resting below my chin. Dean smirks as I gulp audibly and lick my dry lips, head facing upwards yet still maintaining eye contact. He breaks it by looking at my neck with renewed interest and starts moving the cool piece of metal up and down my exposed throat, maintaining that sinful smirk on his face and I couldn’t help but shiver at the ministrations.

Glancing outside Dean whispers to me, “It seems we are gonna have to become more convincing with my threat. Don’t cha think Cas?”

Slowly I turn to look outside and squint at the now unseemly worried cops. They must have assumed he wouldn’t do anything to me and they seemed even more resolved in staying put. Turning back to Dean I nod slowly in response. He winks quickly at me before removing the gun off my throat and tugging me off the table aggressively. He then proceeded in turning me around, placing my back to his too warm body, skillfully wrapping around his arm around my waist.

His hands felt hot on my body but ignored it at moment in favor of starting to cry pseudo tears; Dean did say _we_ needed to convince them of his seemingly dangerous threat. I visibly start sniffling loudly as Dean raises the gun to my temple and starts moving us to the front of the store. Once we were outside the cops, spotting my tears, became alarmed once more and raised their guns towards Dean and I.  

“Dean Winchester release Mister Novak towards us NOW!” the cop from before bellowed again.

Dean’s grip against my waist becoming bruising, and I would’ve become excited at the thought of having Dean’s marks on me but unfortunately I don’t bruise easily for obvious _healing_ reasons.

“You had your five minutes and now I’m telling you getting the fuck out of way before I start blowing up heads!” Deans yells out venomously and to emphasize his point he raises the gun in the air and proceeded in shooting three times before placing his gun back on my temple.

Dean then starts to whisper in my ear, “I’m not really sorry about this Cas but I’m taking you with me since you’re probably the only thing that is gonna let us leave here in one piece.”

I stop sniffling and deflate a bit at the implications behind Dean’s words, surely to Dean I’m not only a type of insurance to him right? Dean sensing my increasing disappointment speaks again, “But that’s not the only reason why you’re coming with me Cas.” He proves his point by gently nibbling on my ear causing to me shiver against him once again, it was proving extremely difficult in ignoring the scorching body heat behind me and not doing anything about it. I nod softly and continue with my performance.

Slowly Dean begins to walking towards a beautiful sleek black car and the cops, with their guns still in air, proceeded in following our every move. Time stood still when we reached the car with Dean’s gun still at my head and the cops still aiming at Dean.

Then in the midst of a few seconds I was thrown in to the car with Dean quickly going to the driver’s side and speeding away with the cops quickly on our trail.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave reviews please? Helps with this writer's self-esteem I guess.  
> Stay tune!!


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